There is no greater feeling than one of acceptance. It doesn't matter how many people place rejection upon you, you do NOT need to receive it! If you know you are accepted in the Beloved, you won't be offended by the rejection of others. True agape love is unconditional. You don't need one's acceptance to walk in love. Your worth is not contingent upon man's opinion. Your worth is a fact, backed by truth (the Word of God). As things are becoming more clear, I am seeing more and more why the Lord used he word "bridge" for this season. After this portion is over, I will be more clear and stable and balanced than I've ever been before in my entire life!! I am realizing why the Lord showed me to stray from television. Why I wasn't to read enjoyable books and stories. Why I wasn't to be out with friends, and the blessing I got in developing a close relationship with a teenage girl in my darkest of days!! I see why the Lord wouldn't let me listen to certains songs, or in VERY small doses. I see why He dealt with me on food and caffeine and alcohol and COFFEE! I see the importance of why I fasted and prayed. The importance of my devotion and loyalty ands faithfulness. It's obvious why the Lord was so adamant with me on how to renew my mind. He showed me how to meditate on the Word and really FOCUS when He's well aware at how scatterbrained I used to be when He first began teaching me!! It's no accident all of the heartache and heartbreak and isolation and rejection I've endured. Yet, what Satan tried to manipulate to steal, kill and destroy me, the Lord is turning it ALL around!! Joel 2:25 where it's all about restoration isn't just referring to the 5 years I lost while being married, but the Lord's plan is SO much more advanced than what I thought or dreamed!! I had NO idea the actual years I've lost due to not being CLEAR. When I asked the Lord about 2012, I believe on December 11th He told me it'd be a year of shalom for me, nothing missing, nothing broken- complete wholeness. That's also the definition of peace! At that point I had NO idea I was movin to Florda. If anything, I was preparing for Virginia/Tennessee. But here I am... sighing a big breath of air... and I smile. I am being shown things about my family, especially about myself, and I smile. The year of 2011 isn't to be looked at as a time of sorrow, even though it was a time of my own "death," but as a time of JOY for the resurrection that has followed. I am taking in everything along the way as I cross over this bridge. It's not a run this time. I've always RAN to my destinations. But now I am walking towards this one. The strongholds I am facing call for a walk. The wheat is being separated from the tares. No more chaos. Only peace. This cloud will lift, it's days are numbered. What lies ahead, and even for where I am right now, it's ALL been worth the fight! Friendships, family... FREEDOM!!
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